​My dining room table is big enough for eight people, more if we don’t mind being really crowded. It’s rectangular with a dark brown finish and scarred in places where drinks have been spilled, causing the finish to peel off. No matter. The table is always covered (or partially-covered) with a tablecloth and placemats anyway and a basket of yellow daisies or other flowers in the center.

​The scarred places on the table’s surface are reminders of the many meals that our family members have shared while seated around the table. My husband Lyle and I were raised in ranch settings where families ate meals while gathered around the table, and we grew up realizing the benefits of the togetherness the experience provided. 

​Lyle believed: ” While nurturing our bodies, we also nurture our souls.” So, when we had our sons, we did as when we were young; we ate together at the table and enjoyed each other’s company. Our son Jody was the first one to sit at the table in his highchair. Then, a little later, Lyle made a little box, covered in an upholstery-like fabric, that fit on the seat of a dining room chair. That way Jody was tall enough to reach the table. By then it was Jamie’s turn to sit in the highchair. (The little box is still used by the family.)

​In just the “blink of an eye,” our sons grew up and married, and now there are grandchildren and great-grandchildren, and we still gather around the table to share mealtime. It’s a happy, nurturing time with no scoldings, no tears, no fighting. Everybody — even the little ones — get a chance to speak.

Sitting together, there’s eye contact, touching, sharing and learning how to listen, in other words —togetherness. 

​Not long ago I read a chapter in a book with sample topics that could be used to start conversations at the dinner table. No need for sample conversation topics in our family. Each person has plenty to say and is given the chance to say it. Included in an unbelievably long list of what we might talk about are: what we’ve been doing, what life was like in the past, and opinions as to whether space crafts have visited earth. 

​After we’ve had our fill of food, conversation at the table continues long after dessert. This past Easter Sunday, when son Jody and family were here, I happened to glance at the dining room clock hanging on the wall. We had been sitting there talking for about two hours following the meal.

​Little kids don’t have the attention spans of adults so they want to get down and play after they have eaten. I can remember the scenario as if it were happening right now. The little ones ask to get down. Moms Cindy and Brandi glance at their plates and say something such as, “If you eat one more green bean and a little more potatoes, you can get down.” They did, gotdown, played a little bit and then, remarkably, often came back to the table, crawled underneath, and listened to the grown-ups talk.

​Tables come in all sizes, shapes and colors. What matters is the gathering around them. It’s all about togetherness.