Christina M. Currie: Parent’s IQ test |

Christina M. Currie: Parent’s IQ test

Should you even have children?

Christina M. Currie

My kids are fairly well-behaved. They’re intelligent, clean, don’t suffer from malnutrition and make it to school on time 93 percent of the time.

Yet, according to an online quiz that popped up that I couldn’t resist taking, I should not be a parent.

At least, not without adult supervision.

I failed the quiz dismally.

That’s hard news when you’ve managed to get two girls to their seventh and eighth (almost eighth and ninth, oh my) birthdays in one piece.

So, I’m going to chalk this one up to a flawed test. I mean, clearly, you can’t give a multiple choice quiz without offering all possible correct answers. Right?

Let’s see if you don’t agree. Here’s the quiz. Below are the correct answers. Or, at least options they should have included if they wanted a really accurate test.

• 1. You can usually start using sunscreen once your child is :

a) 2 months old

b) 6 months old

c) 12 months old

d) 2 years old

• 2. Children should face backwards in their car seat until they are :

a) 20 pounds

b) 12 months old

c) Either a or b (don’t you hate these kinds of choices?)

d) Both a and b

• 3. What age can you begin 2 percent or low fat milk?

a) 6 months

b) 12 months

c) 18 months

d) 2 years

• 4. At what age can you start using insect repellents with DEET?

a) 2 months

b) 6 months

c) 12 months

d) 2 years

• 5. An 8-year-old should eat :

a) 3 to 5 servings of vegetables each day

b) 1 to 2 servings of fruits each day

c) 2 to 3 servings of fruits each day

d) Both a and c

• 6. When should boys start puberty?

a) Between 8 and 13 years

b) Between 9 and 14 years

c) Between 10 and 15 years

d) Between 11 and 15 years

• 7. Warts are caused by :

a) A prion

b) A bacteria

c) A virus

d) Genetics

• 8. Kids with Fifth Disease usually have :

a) A high fever

b) Red cheeks

c) A pink rash on their arms

d) Both b and c

• 9. What’s the earliest that most kids can begin potty training?

a) 9 months

b) 12 months

c) 15 months

d) 18 months

• 10. At what age do most kids learn to name their first color?

a) 12 months to 2 years

b) 18 months to 2 1/2 years

c) 2 to 3 years

d) 2 1/2 to 3 1/2 years

1. e) Slightly pink around the edges 2. e) The nice officer tells you they should 3. e) You run out of formula, try a bit of milk and they don’t throw up. 4. e) is DEET bad? 5. e) All the fruits and vegetables they can’t get the dog to eat first. 6. e) Not a clue, but just to cover my bases, my kids are going to an all-girls school from the ages of 8 to 16. 7. e) kissing frogs 8. e) four older siblings 9. e) as soon as you run out of the diapers you got as gifts at the baby shower. 10. e) shortly after they learn to cuss.

And those, my friends, are the answers of a true parent.

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