Annie’s Mailbox: Woman tried to mend family |

Annie’s Mailbox: Woman tried to mend family

Dear Annie: I am 55 and have been married to Jim, age 73, for five years.

Jim’s wife died six years before we met, and his two children became furious when he began dating, saying he was being unfaithful.

They badgered Jim until he deeded them his house and property. Jim also gave each kid $250,000 in cash and paid off the mortgages on their homes.

The deeds specify that Jim can stay on the property as long as he lives, but make no provision for a surviving spouse. When we married, Jim asked the kids to allow me to continue to live there after he dies, but they refused.

After that, whenever the kids asked for money, Jim told them it was time they lived within their means. (They have good jobs.) They became hostile and accused Jim of choosing me over them.

Participate in The Longevity Project

The Longevity Project is an annual campaign to help educate readers about what it takes to live a long, fulfilling life in our valley. This year Kevin shares his story of hope and celebration of life with his presentation Cracked, Not Broken as we explore the critical and relevant topic of mental health.

They have not allowed him to see the grandchildren for three years. The only time they speak to him is to demand he divorce me.

Without telling Jim, I sent both his children a polite e-mail asking what it would take for us to be a family again. They told Jim about the letter, and he accused me of interfering in his relationship with his kids, saying it was none of my business and I have “ruined all possibility of reconciliation.”

I was shocked by his reaction, but apologized. However, Jim will not accept my apology.

Was I out of line? What about his kids? Is there any hope for this family?

— Tired of Drama

Dear Tired: Jim is worn down from fighting with his kids, defending his marriage and missing his grandchildren.

Although your intentions were good, the e-mail was the straw that broke the camel’s back. His selfish children used it as an excuse to attack him in force.

Ask Jim to go with you for counseling to see whether your relationship can withstand the pressure. If he won’t go, go without him.

Dear Annie: I would like to respond to “V.W.,” who has an autistic child and whose relatives don’t understand how demanding it is.

I have three children, one of whom has already been diagnosed with Asperger’s and the other two are showing similar traits.

I found support through my child’s school and the local county services. The county provides respite care, and the school has special classes where I have made friends with other parents.

Also, I discovered and, where you can search for trustworthy sitters in your area, some of whom may have experience dealing with autistic children.

A starting point is asking the school nurse, school counselors or family doctors what services are available in your area. Support makes a big difference.

— N.Y.

Dear N.Y.: Thank you. Websites like the ones you listed provide child care, senior care, pet sitters, housekeeping services and even tutors.

We appreciate the information.

Support Local Journalism

Support Local Journalism

Readers around Craig and Moffat County make the Craig Press’ work possible. Your financial contribution supports our efforts to deliver quality, locally relevant journalism.

Now more than ever, your support is critical to help us keep our community informed about the evolving coronavirus pandemic and the impact it is having locally. Every contribution, however large or small, will make a difference.

Each donation will be used exclusively for the development and creation of increased news coverage.


Start a dialogue, stay on topic and be civil.
If you don't follow the rules, your comment may be deleted.

User Legend: iconModerator iconTrusted User