Confusion is running mad throughout Moffat County today, as I am sure it is in all other counties.
In today’s day and age when our leader, President Barack Obama, names a czar for almost every issue that arises, he has apparently overlooked this very important one.
The downtown businesses, Centennial Mall, Sunset Meadows and Craig Christian Church are hosting Halloween trick-or-treating events Saturday, which happens to be the day before the actual holiday.
Folks have been calling the city, the Craig Chamber of Commerce and the newspaper to find out which day is appropriate for trick-or-treating.
Just to be sure that a czar had not been named, I called Moffat County Commissioner Audrey Danner — she was not named czar.
I called city manager Jim Feree — he isn’t the czar, either.
I called Moffat County Sheriff Tim Jantz, who also was not named Czar. However, he did point to Craig Police Chief Walt Vanatta. But, when questioned, Vanatta said he was not the czar.
The Craig City Council has not declared an official Halloween holiday for the city since 1999, Vanatta said.
The indulgent, greedy capitalist in me is completely frustrated because the government has apparently failed to give me sufficient direction in which to reign in my natural tendency toward hoarding all the trick-or-treat dividends.
Hence, my children and I will take this opportunity to acquire assets derived from trick-or-treating all weekend long.
Now, however satirical this column has begun, I have unilaterally named myself the official Moffat County trick-or-treat czar.
My direction to you would be that you ensure the safety of your children first. Then, allow them to trick-or-treat on Saturday or Sunday, whichever fits your schedule more appropriately. Please, be respectful of your neighbors and only visit those who have their porch light on.
To those of you planning to distribute candy, if you don’t want visitors on Saturday and/or Sunday, please make sure your porch light is off.
Just a little humor as you prepare for your weekend.
Hope you enjoy Halloween, and be safe out there.