Kathy Bassett's column, "The View from Maybell," appears in the Saturday Morning Press.
Have you ever been so bored that you just started Googling things?
For those of you who truly don't know, Google is a giant search engine on the Internet. You can type just about anything on Google and come up with answers. So, yes : I'm guilty. I Googled up "Maybell, Colorado."
I've lived in the Browns Park and Maybell area for many years, and I had no idea that Maybell was such a big, important town. In fact, Google brought up 23,800 items about "Maybell, Colorado" in 0.28 seconds. We have all been thoroughly fooled all these years. Holy cow!
Did you know for example that there are 39 jobs found in the Maybell area? There are jobs available in the agricultural, biotechnical equipment, chemical, computer hardware, instrument, mechanical, pharmaceutical, software, advertising and medical sales, as well as manager positions. They need a wireless salesman and a food demonstrator.
Why, mercy me ... you can even search for a doctor in Maybell and find a dermatologist and a neonatologist. Woooeeee!
I truly don't know the exact population of Maybell, because we have had some dear friends depart in the past several months, and we have had some births and in fact, we have one that is very close to upping the population any hour now. Jason and Erin Musser are expecting their second child.
We all know there aren't that many houses here, and you can practically see them all from U.S. Highway 40 as you pass through town.
We have a grocery store, post office, school, library, park, motel, hotel, County Shop, processing plant, restaurant, volunteer ambulance and fire department, sewer plant, community center and church.
Other than that, I can't see how they could come up with 23,800 items, unless they are counting the deer, elk and antelope that hang around town.
A food demonstrator job? Hmm: The only one I know of is the time that I got into a watermelon seed spitting contest with a guy in the park. He won. I wonder if that counts. Watermelon is a food. We were demonstrating. People were laughing.
And a dermatologist? Wow. Dermatology. The only thing I can think of is when we women get out there in the corrals when it is the muddiest gooiest day of the year, because the fellas need our help and we get plenty of mud packs along with cow manure spread all over our bodies and in our hair. Did you ever find an easy way of washing cow crap out of your hair? The more you scrub, the more it sinks into the roots and tries to hide there. I truly think that helps because there are an awfully lot of pretty women in Maybell.
I have to mention the pharmaceutical position. I know that it is not FDA approved, but several of us get in really good positions when we go out and pick juniper berries, gather Indian Tea along with a few other herbs and wild growing plants, take them home, make tea and drink the stuff. In a day or two we feel all new again. Course I don't recommend anyone else doing this because : well, just because. This is Maybell and you just need to keep going to your own doctor and getting help. We Maybellians are a different breed.
The wonderful thing about Maybell is the fact that everyone knows everyone else. Sometimes that is a good thing. Other times, well ...
Folks can be irritated with one another, angry, not speaking, and yet if one of Maybell's own were to get hurt in any way : the whole town regroups and helps out in ways you can't imagine.
I believe that the backbone of the town is the Maybell Women's Club, and they go above and beyond the line of duty to get involved with projects for the good of the people and the town. There are a lot of other helpful folks in town also. And it isn't like we are all rednecks around here.
Google must have us confused with someplace else. There could be, but there might not be, 39 houses in Maybell. However, it appears there are 39 available jobs.
I think I will grab the shovel out of the back of my truck and go scoop some more manure.