Kerry Alonso: Youths have no respect

Youths have no respect

To the editor:

First I would like to congratulate all Moffat County Bulldogs teams for a great homecoming week, the football team for playing a great game and the Middle School volleyball teams and seventh- and eighth-grade football players for great seasons. You are all great kids and deserve recognition.

Homecoming is a fun time to show our pride in our kids and schools and to show school spirit.

It is a shame there is not much pride anymore. I am not from here but am proud my kids are, and they are proud to be Bulldogs!

I witnessed two events this weekend that have me concerned.

While I was in the homecoming parade with CMS football teams, we saw some high school-age kids use filthy language and gestures directed at the team and parade.

If it's not bad enough strangers cussed us, the way kids treated us at the game was appalling.

I attended the football game with a group and before the end of the first half most had left in anger. A group of kids had gathered in front of us and refused to sit down so that we could see the game. They repeatedly were asked politely, but they ignored, sneered at or cussed at us and others.

The situation quickly got out of control, and school officials got involved. Unfortunately, their presence made no difference. The way those kids spoke to us was nothing compared to how one girl spoke to her principal. They were rude and arrogant. We were told it was "tradition" for them to stand there, and it was basically a reserved section. In fact, we were told to leave and ask for a refund because there was nothing they could do.

Seriously?

Not once did anyone say it was reserved, nor were there markings. If we had left or moved seats, those kids would have won, but they won anyway. They got away with speaking to their principal and other adults with complete and utter disrespect, and they continued to stand on bleacher seats for the entire game. No one spoke up about their behavior. Parents need to know how their kids behave in public, but maybe that's the problem - the parents don't care.

I know teenage years are hard. I've been there. Kids need to know we do care, but they will be held accountable for actions.

Let me get one thing straight - this letter is not about the seating situation, although something needs to be done. Clearly mark it as reserved and those who want to stand should be at the back.

Anyway, this is about the kids and their utter disregard for others. I was embarrassed and appalled at what I heard and saw and what my young kids had to see.

At the middle school our motto is:

Be respectful

Be responsible

Be safe

These kids here learn it, they know it is right and they try to live it. Maybe the world would be just a little bit better if we all live by those three small rules at school, at work and most importantly at home.

Kerry Alonso

Craig

Comments

dogfan 5 years, 9 months ago

If I ever caught one of my kids disrespecting a school teacher or principal like this they would have a warm bottom. But our society has become so that schools cannot punish kids any more. Lets give them a time out instead. I went through school without being in alot of trouble, but when I did screw up the principal had a paddle that would get your attention. I don't think I suffered any from this, but did learn respect for the teachers and school administrators. Maybe we need to bring back the paddles in the principals office, then maybe the kids might respect them.

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grannyrett 5 years, 9 months ago

Maybe that's part of the problem. Parents need to dicipline their kids at home. If the paddle is applied at home, maybe it won't be needed at school. My Dad would have skinned me alive if I acted up in public. That was a real deterent.

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tamsmom 5 years, 9 months ago

I also grew up in a time when the principals and teachers all had paddles and were not afraid to use them. But, my parents also had one at home and if I got it at school you could bet that was nothing compared to what I would get at home. Lucky for me I stayed out of trouble for the most part, but I knew better and I am a better person now because of it, And I would never have dreamed of talking to an adult that way. I think more parents need to get involved and make some phone calls to other parents when you see something like that happen. That's how it used to be. It's too bad that no one uses the paddle any more and parents are even afraid to dicipline their own children much less tell someone else's how to behave in public. I heard the way those kids talked at the football game and I saw they very innappropriate sexual behaviors that were going on in the stands and down below. Where are the school administrators? They were johnny on the spot apparently to tell the spectators that they could leave the game and now some kid wants them to be ejected from all events, but they were no where around when the kids were acting ignorant and rude and making out in the middle of a crowd, Those kids should have been asked to leave or at the very least sit down or move and as for the making out - don't most schools these days have a no PDA (public display of affection) rule? If not they should. You are not allowed to drink or smoke on school property why should they be allowed to make out and fondle one another in the stands under a blanket or under the bleachers? This topic just gets me going because kids these days have no respect for anyone around them and no respect for themselves either.

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neutral1 5 years, 9 months ago

Thank you! I unfortunately have had similar experiences around town. Growing up I remember mom giving us a run down of rules prior to entering the bank, store or other public place! Stay by her, don't yell, etc. 'Or Else!' I would have been embarassed to be seen out with any of these disrespectful youths when I was their age, raised military you respected others around you especially the adults.
I also would like to acknowledge that I know several teenagers that are respectful and use common courtesies in public places, school and home. However the bad always seem to overshadow!

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freeman 5 years, 9 months ago

using a paddle,,???? what about a thick leather belt across there a--,,,and a couple of right hands across there mouth..these kids have no respect now days and need to be brought up to standard.

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lonelyone 5 years, 9 months ago

You know I agree with you guys. Many of todays youth are ill mannered and disrespectful, but I have seen and heard many adults that act the same way. Maybe these kids come from homes where the parents act that way too and they don't know any difference??? I just think we can't expect the kids to act better when many adults are just as bad............that's not to say I condone the way they act, I'm just saying they do as they are taught.

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grannyrett 5 years, 9 months ago

lonelyone-You are so right. It is sad. If a parent doesn't reinforce good behavior at home, how can we expect their children to be any better? Schools shouldn't have to teach kids good manners. That's a parent's job. Many have fallen short of the mark.

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dogfan 5 years, 9 months ago

My kids have gotten the paddle or belt growing up. If I ever heard of one of them acting like this or disrespecting an adult they know there would be h#&& to pay when they get home. People have gotten scared to even spank their own kids.

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DV8 5 years, 9 months ago

Unfortunately it goes much further than parents not spanking their kids. Parents don't want to parent or teach their kids. They want to give them everything, don't want to tell them "no", because it may be a hassle or hurt the kids' feelings, so they do nothing, not even correct them. Some even write to the paper supporting their children's misbehavior. They think their kids "need" x-box, I-pod, and cell phones and don't want to take these precious items away as discipline.

The schools are not any better, they do very little if there is problem. Their answer is to medicate the child for acting like a child, calling the police, or find a way to remove the child from their classroom or even the school, because they don't feel they should have to deal with it.

When I was a kid, my parents taught me right from wrong and morals and made sure I was aware when I misbehaved. I learned to respect them and others, without ever being hit by them.

The schools taught me math, english, spelling, etc. and if I didn't try to learn, I got a poor grade and knew that if I kept it up, I could be held back. Teachers actually tried to teach kids who were disruptive and tried to figure out how to maximize their learning. Now, the schools don't care if you have solid F's, they pass you anyway, because they don't want to hurt the child's feelings. It's amazing how many kids cannot spell properly. They all spell with what is called "kidspell", which is a clever word for phoenetically. The school teaches this in early grades, to get them used to writing, but never correct the student in later years, because they don't want them to feel bad that they cannot spell correctly. Some teachers assign homework in elementary school that they require the parent to teach the child how to do.

Teachers and parents need to do their jobs. Teach kids what they are supposed to and help them learn appropriate behaviors in their appropriate settings (parents - home and society, teachers/principals - in school)

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tamsmom 5 years, 9 months ago

Thank you all! It's nice to know that others fell the same way. I just cannot believe that adults would stand up for those kids and make their behaviors okay. It is ridiculous that anyone would try to make excuses for their kids but that is our society I guess. These kids learn their behaviors somewhere and if dad is saying it's okay to cuss at a school official or adults then we all know where his kid gets it from. Too bad for the rest of us who try to teach our kids right from wrong, they have to go to school with those kids and are influenced by them. I just hope that we have all taught our kids to be strong enough to not follow the crowd.

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eieio 5 years, 9 months ago

I believe Kerrry Alonso left out a lot of the story. I also was sitting at the game. The kids always stand up. I think this is great that they are there supporting our team. The kids were minding their business when these people behind them starting spraying soda and throwing soda bottles at them. The language these adults were using was absolutely incredible. Especially since they had young children with them. Their kids are going to be one of the high schoolers she was talking about one of these days. The high schoolers were using foul language also. But when they were asked to stop they did, unlike the adults above them. They sent one of their kids down to pick up a bottle they had thrown at the high schoolers to they could spray more soda on them and throw it again. Another adult sitting there took the bottle away and then turned the adults in for their behavior, not the high schoolers. If you want respect from these kids you need to give it. Our kids learn through behavior that is taught to them. Unfortunately, the high schooler that was using the foul language probably has a parent just like the ones above them using the same language and has not or does not realize what they are even saying is offesive to other people. This language becomes part of their daily lives when used at home. I believe these adults need to take a look at their behavior before looking at our children this way. My daughter was one of the high schoolers sitting in that group. She could not believe that adults were talking and acting out that way. How sad is that!! Someone younger than yourself Kerry knows better than you!! Grow up and start acting how you would like to be treated.

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kerrya 5 years, 9 months ago

Trust me, I did not leave out a lot of the story. An awful lot of it was edited by the paper for space requirements. But maybe you should get your story straight, eieio. That soda bottle was thrown by the students, not the adult, and it was picked up by a young girl not because anyone told her too but because she was upset that someone had taken it from her dad. What about the cups and trash that were thrown by the kids and hit my young daughter in the head? I will tell you now, that just because one person who was sitting with our very large group decided to does not mean that the rest of us thought it was okay. I do not agree with what was done, nor is this about the seating arrangement at the games. I could care less where those kids sit or stand I have real issues with the attitudes. Yes, the situation was not handled properly - by ANYONE, not the adults in the stands, not the kids, and certainly not by school officials. You want to tell ME to grow up? Not once did I cuss at those kids but yes I did yell at them to knock the crap off. It was unprovoced behavior by those kids in the beginning to tell and adult to F* off because he asked them politely to sit down so he could see. You are part of the problem because you are making what the kids did okay. and you are grouping all of us sitting behind those kids in the same category. I just gave a voice - publically not anonymously - to the concerns many have about kids these days. I do apologize that my letter sounded as though all of those kids were behaving badly, It was mainly the back two rows. I do not feel as though I should apologize for the actions of another though, and I won't. There was a lot of heated words between a lot of people in those stands that night, from our group and many others in the stands. I am offended that you want to tell me to grow up and act my age and that you would imply that my kids would ever act like that. I know that kids act differently when they are not with their parents, and maybe my kids will do stupid things but they also know that there will be consequences for their actions. Unlike those filthy mouthed kids who know that their parents will stand up for them and condone their behaviors. You need to get your story straight. If you were indeed sitting near there why didn't you stand up and tell those kids to behave? I did my part with my group but I did not know any of those kids. Not once did another adult step in and tell the kids to stop the language. The easy solution would for someone to have stood up to them and asked them to please move or sit somewhere else. Most of the people in the stands were not regulars and had no idea that they would be sitting behind a "reserved" section. It wasn't marked after all. I would not ever disrespect a child in any way, I have kids of my own and I work with them every day, and for you to imply that is insulting to me.

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AltitudeAdjustment 5 years, 9 months ago

The sad thing is, is that school officials will likely put a student section right smack in the middle of the grand stands and there by preventing people on either side of the students from seeing very well when the ball is in the Red Zone. They should put it at the very end of the stands so the kids can stand from the bottom to the top without getting in anybody's way. Does that make sense? If you rope off an entire section from the bottom to the top in the middle of the stands it will actually create more of a problem. It is likely though that even if School Officials do rope off a student section, student won't abide by the requirments and officials won't do anything to enforce it. They tried getting students to sit down at the last game and the students told them to get bent and i guess they did, because the students didn't sit down.

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kerrya 5 years, 9 months ago

How right you are. I just came from the high school game and guess what? There is indeed a student section roped off - from top to bottom right in the middle of the stands. What a great solution. And you know what really makes me mad? Not a single one of those kids stood up once during the game. That's right - they sat for the whole game and never once cheered for the team or helped out the cheerleaders. Great student cheering section. I also can't believe how petty the parents can be. It's too bad they don't have the nerve to say something to my face. (you know who you are )They know me and knew full well that I was sitting in front of them and they sounded so "mature" making those cute little comments like "don't touch my blanket or I will write a letter about you in the paper" or how about "you better find a seat so I don't spray pop all over you"? Yep, really mature adults there huh? I don't feel that I should have to justify someone elses actions and I don't see how just because my letter was in the paper the same time as Mr Mann's letter that I somehow was involved in the pop incident? Just making an observation here, but you tell me who needs to grow up? Oh, and it was great to see the police presence tonight and the school officials were all over the place. Unfortunately there was not even half of the attendance of last week's game. I am not ashamed a bit about my letter to the editor or to say what I think -freedom of speech right?- I just wish those of you who have something to say to me would stand up and be a man and say it to my face. You want to debate this issue? Bring it on. I will stand by my opinion and I will stand up for myself and not hide behind some stupid sarcastic remarks. Oh, and by the way, the Bulldogs last home game is on October 31st. Come out and support our team. I am sure that we could all give the "student cheering section" a run for their money.

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DV8 5 years, 9 months ago

Exactly my point. It is no wonder the kids act that way when the parents feel just as entittled and support them being rude and obscene in front of younger kids, even to the point they harrass another adult for speaking out. It also goes to show that when there is supervision from the school and/or Police that things don't get out of hand. It is too bad that when not allowed to act like idiots, the student "cheering" section does nothing.

Kerrya, you did the right thing by writing. It obviously prompted the school to do something by having a presence of the officials and there was at least one football game that young children could watch without having to here sexualized comments being yelled from the student "cheering" section. Good Job.

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kerrya 5 years, 9 months ago

Thank you DV8. I do want to say that I am glad that the police were there. When I read my comment it sounded as though I was being sarcastic and I wasn't. I also don't care where they put the student section, I am just glad that they finally did it, but again, the kids were being rude. By not standing up and cheering their team on when they most needed it what are they proving? and to whom? Most of the kids in that section last night were not there last week and they were just following the crowd. That's how so many good kids get into trouble - by following the crowd. I have obviously opened up a can of worms with my letter and I just hope that people realize that something needs to be done with these kids and their behaviors. It needs to be addressed at home and at school.

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rissarose 5 years, 9 months ago

so when you were teenagers you cared about your elders sitting behind you in the stands? i didnt think so because i know i didnt. It is a high school football game, what do you expect? at least there not on the streets and the community only gets involved during homecoming anyways

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DV8 5 years, 9 months ago

Yes, when I was a teenager, I was obnoxious. Did I care about the elders behind me? no. If asked to stop doing something offensive or rude, I did. Not because they were adults, but because my parents taught me the novel idea of common courtesy and manners, something that some parents have obviously disregarded.

As to them being at the game and not on the streets... Does it matter? They could be on the streets drinking, but some show up to the game after drinking, or go to a party after the game. They could be on the streets getting in fights, or they can pick a fight during or after the game. They could be disrespectful to other on the streets, or they can tell people to F off and yell insulting or obscene comments while the cheerleaders are doing cheers.

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kerrya 5 years, 9 months ago

rissarose, were you a kid that used to cuss and yell at adults? Just because it is a high school game makes it okay? I don't think so. When I was a kid, yes we did stand up and yell, but where I went to school we had our own section at the END of the stadium so we didn't have to worry about adults behind us. And even if we did have adults behind us that asked us to sit down we would have or at least tried to come up with a solution that didn't involve telling them to F* off. It is NEVER okay for a child to treat an adult that way, I am not saying that it is okay for adults to be foul to kids, but kids these days should not expect to only respect an adult if they are given it first - They are KIDS - we are ADULTS! I have always been taught to respect my elders - no matter how old they are or how old I am.

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eieio 5 years, 9 months ago

I am eieio's daughter and it really upsets me that you put All of the high schoolers in the same group cause I will tell you for a fact that there was a whole group of us that were not cursing. And to clear things up some of the high schoolers were throwing thing and that is wrong and i aploligize for their behavior but as my mom said that girl that went down to pick up the soda bottle what really happened (since you are worried about what really happened) is that one of the kids got sick of pop being sprayed at them wouldn't you? Took it and threw it. Then the dad sent her down there to get it so he could spray water at us isn't that respectful?

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kerrya 5 years, 9 months ago

Well, eieio's daughter - you need to go back and read the posts again I think. I apologized earlier for the fact that my letter made it sound like all the kids were cussing. I did in fact say that it was mainly the back two rows, and if you were sitting in the middle of the group like you said in a different post then you would have no idea what happened with the pop bottle right? I was directly behind and saw the whole thing (and NO I did not think that it was right and I said so). The pop bottle was grabbed by a student and thrown and the little girl went and got it for her dad because she was upset that someone would do that. No one told her to go and get it and she had no idea what the heck was going on - only that someone took something that belonged to her dad. You say that I put all the high schoolers in the same group by saying they were all cussing? how is that any different than you saying that all of the adults who were sitting there are guilty of spraying soda?

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